Life, Parenting And Relationships



When we are Born if we are not among the unfortunate ones who are Born with defects, we are blessed with a perfect Template to design our Lives, a plain white sheet of paper to write our life story. If there is such a thing as a Godlike creature a New Born is the perfect example. What is written on that Paper and what is filled into the Template is what we absorb during the developmental stages. That describes who and what we are and to become for the rest of our lives. Fallacies can develop as early as six months old, a Child who cries for his Mother’s attention not because he is hungry wet or is in any kind of distress, only because he enjoys the comfort of her cradling arms is a manipulative controlling person in the Make.

If you fail to recognize the game and take control early when they get to one year old, sitting in their High Chair and throw their Spoon on the Floor for the twentieth time and you picked it up each time you are fostering to the manipulating person in the Make. Continued to six years old and you say no to an outrageous request and they hit you with ” you don’t love me” then you flip your decision and give in, the battle is lost and the war is on. And now you have me at fourteen smoking Weed with my twelve years old Catholic School Buddy, thinking that I could Rule my single Mom. My Mother was no pushover, she laid out choices such as the comfort of my own Bedroom or a Cot in a Juvenile Detention Center. If a Parent don’t take control early then the manipulating and controlling person has taken shape on the Template, for the rest of their lives.

What is written on that plain white sheet of paper depicts who we are and who we becomes. As a Twig is bent so shall it grows. My Mother was a God fearing Christian Woman she Nurtured this Twig with Milk and Honey, yet at nine years old I stole from the Church collection in the Rectory, the Neighborhood Grocery Stores and the Neighborhood Dealer. I was Born with my own personal Minion called Me. I had no reasons to be bad, there were no lack of guidance or parenting skills, my Mother help raised her twelve siblings and her siblings children, she could have written a Book on Parenting, so where did she go wrong with me. She didn’t, if anyone blamed her for my transgressions, then who do you blame  for Eve’s transgressions, Her Minion was the Serpent,Cain’s Minion was Jealousy.

And so the Concept of good and evil is laid to rest, how we deal with our Minions define who we are. The way that people turns out to be Monsters doesn’t necessarily have anything to do with environment or upbringing. People will always be who they are, the Minions only gives them the push. By God accepting Able’s gift the Murderous Tendency in Cain was brought to the surface by his own Minions. The reason for all this Theological thinking was brought upon me from trying figure the Root Cause for Domestic Violence and Child Abuse. At first all the old cliche’s were dominant in my mind, the abused becomes the abuser, as a Twig is bent and all the other made up alibies. Then I reflected to my twelve years old friend and myself being Deviants with the best of upbringing and I realized that it is neither of the above that produces Horrible people who would take out all their aggressive tendencies on the ones who loved them.

The despicable act of Domestic Violence have weighed heavily on me from the early developmental age of twelve, Mister Henrique was my next door Neighbor he would get off work every Day and stop at the Bar and feed his Minions with Alcohol. He came Home just about every Day and beat his Wife in the yard in front of me and the other Neighborhors. That ongoing Horror Movie Psyched me out to the point where if I had a Gun, I would have shot him to put that poor Woman out of her miseries. Growing up with a single Mom gave me empathy for a fifteen years old Boy I met later on in Life who stabbed his abusive Stepfather over twenty times in Brooklyn N.Y. Then there were my Childhood friends who Married each other, the Boy had been studying Martial Arts for years he was a Black Belt, his Hands were Licensed legal Weapons.

If a person on the Street picked a fight with him all he could do was to cover himself, if he hit them he would go to Jail. His Wife was filled with rage, with an uncontrollable temper,  since we were Kids we called her Maddie. They had one Child together, I think that the beatings started when the Child was only months old in it’s Crib witnessing his Mother beating his Father with whatever she could put her hands on, she knew that he could not strike back. The beatings were constantly visible on his black and blue skin. He was part of a tight knit group we would have Jam sessions where we played instruments and sang at our frequent gatherings. Every Male in the Group including her own Brother advised him to kick her Ass and teach her a Lesson. Other than the fact that his Hands were Licensed Weapons, this Man was Godlier than all of us. He never laid a Hand on her, last time I saw them the Child was five years old watching his father’s Manhood being robbed of him. What an Education this Kid was getting. I can only pray to God that I am right that we are only who we choose to be and not a product of our Environment, otherwise this Child is a Monster in the Make, he will have a deep rooted hatred for Women, he Will beat every Woman in his Relationships exacting revenge for his Father, Sex to him will be same as a Rapist, strictly punishment. I do hope that the Lord looks out for this Baby.

P.S. October is Domestic Violence awareness Month.

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